The Adult Equivalent of Being a Brat

OSTBITTEN FELICITATIONS, YE FREQUENTLY FLEXING FOPS!

As I watch the final crimson leaf descend from the birch tree in my backyard and Fall begins to settle in my bones, I take that first deep, crisp breath which somehow signifies the beginning of a new season. Time to turn over new leaves, perhaps. Find new topics of conversation. Figure out who is integral to you, not just who was there for the memories you barely remember because they were probably less than memorable.

Recently I’ve very much enjoyed being the brunt of some adolescent threats, always spoken to others and not myself, and it has only reminded me of being in 3rd-grade, especially the instance when a 7th-grade kid picked me up by the ankles got speed-bagged in the jewels and publicly whooped for his efforts. When he went to a teacher immediately after there was a unanimous social response, “He crossed a line, he wanted to bully Yung Bear, and he got what was coming to him”. I miss that. The unanimous public outcry of people you barely know, standing up for hard truths. Nowadays you have to seemingly find reasons daily to justify continuing to be friends with people when you can just safely leave them as acquaintances that you awkwardly run into at the grocery store once in a blue moon and fain each other with “OMG, Let’s hang out soon. Let’s do coffee. We should absolutely get the gang together”, but have it all be craaaaaaaap. Ain’t that a living? Imagine going to your grave with more hours on Netflix that hours evenings spent with people who don’t want to dig your close-knit group into an inescapable pit. Imagine the amount of sheer self-loathing, grudge-carrying weakness and pitiful pageantry you would need to keep up to be a part of that life. Personally, I just don’t find myself capable of that kind of hate. To literally take time out of your day and OTHER PEOPLES DAYS to try to get them to loathe something as much as you do just seems like nobody took the time to love you as a kid. What I’ve always done in these situations is what I’m doing again now, keeping tabs. I’ve let people come to me and ask my side after being aggressively abraded by some member of “the family”. I haven’t spent my every waking moment shrieking hate at anyone who will listen or being a pile of gutless filth who idly sucks the dick that feeds them. People used to have credibility. People used to need justification other than self-justification to do things. Anyways, to those people, you’re ever going to get a chance to live out your juvenile fantasy of beating up someone half your size, but if you continue to be Facebook friends with me or whatever to track my movements, I hope you enjoy watching me. I’ve got a LOT to do.

ON THE MUSICAL SIDE OF THINGS THAT NEED JUSTIFICATION. . .OR DON’T //

SACRED SIN – LIFE / A PROCESS REVEALED

93′ Death metal from Lisbon, Portugal of all places. Sacred Sin has a decently large repertoire of albums with no shortage of bangers, but their earliest full release has always held a dear place in my heart for the sheer rawness of the recordings. Only 500 pressings were initially made of this classic beast, making it a must own to collectors. The Giger-esque art only fuels my personal attraction as well.

SORCERY – DEATH

Swedish boys bringing some relentless yet crisp riffs to the table today, off of what I would consider their best album. They split up for a while in the mid-nineties but have since resurfaced with the 2013 album “Arrival at Six” and the following 2016 album “Garden of Bones”, which are not a vast separation from the earlier sound of the band by any means.

GREEN DRUID – REBIRTH

Stoned guys gettin’ baked about gettin’ blazed about gettin’ cooked about existentialism about I need to call my mom.

HOPE YOU TURNED YOUR CLOCKS BACK OR TODAY IS GONNA SUUUUCK FER YOOOUUUU!

~BEAR

-BEAR.
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You can find Bear smoking bong and thinking about golems on instagram.

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