Sexual Sunday with Varg Vikernes: The Unlikely Feminist

 

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Varg,

I fuckin cant stand the stupid bitches at my school.  Theres this fuckin chik and she was all cool with me last week when she needed help with her homework and i was all thinking i’d be able to hit and split it and i fukin let her copy my homework and shit and this week she comes to school with this fuckin muscle dummy in a fancy car and shes all kissin him goodbye in front of me and shit.  Shes a stupid fuckin bitch and i fuckin hate chicks because all they do is fuckin use you.  al these fuckin stupid bitches who call themselves feminists are the reason that men like that fuckin return of the king dude want to legalize rape.  im sick of stupid cunts turning me down and using me.

Bitches aint shit in Bainbridge

Dear Bitches,

While I can certainly appreciate the length of time it must have taken for you to cobble together this poorly spelled anti-feminist rant, as well the numerous revisions you must have made to bring this to its current level of barely legible, I must first query what remedial public school institution it is to which you attend?  I will be burning this “establishment” of education to the ground, hopefully with you inside of it.  Women, good women, notice strong men when they see them, and for many good women, they also can smell a strong man, and allow me to tell you, this smell is based on secondary sex pheremones and not cans of Axe body spray sold to you witless consumers by underwear models.  Allow me to say also that your proposed allegiance and sympathy with the Return of Kings leader is terribly sad and truthfully unfortunate.  If you value your life no more than living in your mother’s basement while wearing stained activewear, you deserve harsh and brutal rejection in all of its varied forms.  To stand and say you align yourself with the weak willed teachings of Return of Kings further underscores my point.  You should align your beliefs only with yourself.  Taking thought medicine from charlatans, politicians and critics is the immediate road to mediocrity and this beyond all else is what strong women despise.  Strong women who are good cooks, good homemakers, and good mothers will not be swayed by weak beta males such as yourself, though I have suspicions that you are barely ranking in as a gamma male, or even in the pack at all.

To be an alpha, to be a strong man, you must have wisdom, strength, and an ego that is not so fragile that is crumbles the moment you go to use it.  

Warmly,

Varg Vikernes

 

 

Do you too have poorly written emails to send to Varg? Would you like to be featured in future issues of Sexual Sundays? Be sure to Email Varg with all of your questions.

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