Trash/Thrash Tuesday: Attila – Hate Me

Hey you fucks! Whats new? Are you facing the horrors of another work week with too much caffeine, whiling away the hours until the next seaosn of Trailer Park Boys is released? Yeah, me too. I wasn’t here last week, and I wish I had a super cool reason to not be here, but I was sleeping, because I’m quite elderly. Just kidding – I was sick as fuck. So now that I’m better, I’ve had a burning desire to rip someone to shreds, and I’ve had a few requests to review this band, and since I’m a people pleaser, I figured I would take one for the team and give you what you need. Don’t be scared now, Daddy’s got you.

Okay Attila. What the hell. I don’t even know what this band is and how to accurately summarize the pile of animal excrement that these unfortunate souls happen to be. Now I’ve made fun of metalcore before, for those who follow my antics on twitter and I’ve had some hilarious responses. I’ve recently queried my followers onto what metalcore actually is, and one of my favourite responses was “it’s like faster, harder and BETTER metal”.

I will allow that to sink in for a few minutes.

tell me, moron singer from attila, how does one exactly suck a fuck.

What metalcore actually is, is what emo and screamo “grew up” to be. I use “grew up” in quotations because even though the term means to grow up, this music is still meant for and sold to angry pubescent teenagers who have no jobs, pay no bills, and are likely obviously “hardcore”.

This music may claim to be extreme and hard, and whatever the fuck else it wants to be, but the slickness of high post production and a lot of editing, combined with the super cheese ball excessive swearing and overdone macho posturing, along with the loser appearance of all of the members in these bands (see Motionless in White), just makes the whole thing laughable.

This music isn’t for tough people, it’s for people trying to appear tough and that’s about the size of it. We all know that some of the hardest motherfuckers around don’t even listen to metal, let alone this fucking garbage.

Part of me, the positive part, wants to hope that music like this can be used as a stepping stone further into metal as a genre. Clearly no one rocks their way out of the womb listening to totally awesome tunes (unless you’re like me. I burst forth from my amniotic sac while Joy Division played in the background. we all can’t be so lucky), so everyone has to start somewhere.
That said though, it’s far more respectable to pick up old Sabbath records and listen to music with a modicum of substance rather than this tripe.

What is this song even about really? Hate me? Oh we definitely hate you, because your collective lack of mental capabilities is making the rest of us look bad. Just the other day I had some fuckwit I go to school with ask me if I listened to Attila. No. No I don’t. I would sooner listen to a crazy homeless bum outside my bedroom window beat on a garbage can with a hockey stick, while I saw my own dick off with a razor.
Lord have mercy.

This song enrages me because it makes no goddamn sense – in one line, “I don’t give a fuck about opinions”, directly followed by, “I hope you’re thinking of me”, and then lines about “all YOUR hate and negativity is wrong”, but here I am dressed like a douche canoe scream rapping over generic psuedo death metal about how much I hate you? Who else but a sixteen year old has those kind of bipolar emotions all within a fucking four minute piece? Well, crazy people.. but also hormonal teens, which is again where this music is being marketed to and sold. Blah blah blah, dick in mouth, fucking your mother, something something, popping pills. Yeah, sounds like a weekend party Lindsay Lohan’s house. This shit isn’t shocking to me and these guys look like the type of punk ass little bitches that would turn tail and run the moment shit got real. Call me back when you’ve burned down a church, you morons.

I don’t give a fuck about my bad reputation

Never catch me slipping, red cup solo sipping out the whip with yo bitches
Don’t give a fuck about opinions, that don’t pay the bills
I’m just keeping it real
When you’re out on the town I hope you’re thinking of me
Sipping liquor out the bottle and smoking up on that tree
The moral of the story is I just want you to see
That the opinions of others should never bother you or me

Get fucked, you wonder why nobody likes you but you hate on everything and have a negative outlook
Fuck that, I’m the product of your creation all your hate and negativity made me stronger
Hell yeah, nobody does it like we do it, having this much fun should be illegal whoa,
we’re taking over this bitch, join or die up in this bitch, straight villain till the death of me

HATE ME
Keep my name in your mouth
I’ll keep my dick in your mother while you’re starin at each other
HATE ME
You keep on payin my bills
I’m living just for the thrills
You keep on poppin’ your pills

You’ll never understand
That all your negativity won’t get you shit
You’re so blind and stupid
Just keep on doing you and I won’t give a fuck

hell, yeah

I don’t give a fuck about my bad reputation

You’ll never understand
That all your negativity won’t get you shit
You’re so blind and stupid
Just keep on doin you and I won’t give a fuck

-You can find the oldblackgoat scaring punk ass bitches on twitter and probably listening to better music than this.