Trash/Thrash Tuesdays: Ministry – Relapse


Well good day to you my fellow drunks, how’s life treating you?  Are you adequately preparing for the Halloween?  Are you packing your luggage for Housecore Horror Festival?  I hope so!  This week in Trash/Thrash Tuesdays, which by the way is three weeks old..  and I haven’t forgotten yet, which I pretty much acquaint with me giving up malt liquor and switching to cider, we have on the auditory chopping block Ministry’s – “Relapse”, the song, not the album.  Now, if you all recall from last week in which I make fun of the Misfits for being tired ass washed up has beens, I mentioned that Al Jourgensen was next on my hit list.  Al Jourgensen of Ministry is many things..  crazed madman, seminal music maker, and also the biggest lunatic next to Genesis P.Orridge.  Al Jourgensen, like the Misfits, is guilty of constantly having tours like the C U LA Tour, or other farewell tours, and then returning to music making once he realizes he has no other way to pay for his methamphetamine habit.  I LOVE Ministry, so don’t read me wrong here.  I super LOVE Ministry, but even a super fan has to be able to see that the years of excess have not in fact led to a palace of wisdom for Mr. Jourgensen.  If the song Relapse is anything to go on, buddy should probably chill the fuck out with the drugs before he ends up a dementia patient.

I’m really all for people having fun and doing whatever they please, but I don’t really agree with advocating for crystal meth use in music, even something as non conformist as metal.  I recently discovered that our good buddy Al tattooed a fucking all seeing eye on his forehead so yeah, i don’t think he’s on the road to anything…  he’s definitely already there.

Further to the point, this song sucks..  the lyrics are lackluster and dumb and trying to be controversial.  Good music is hidden behind shitty lyrics, singing about a shitty drug and it makes me so frustrated..  If you wanna sing about nonsense, Jesus Built my Hot Rod is a perfect example of acceptable nonsense.  So remember kids – if someone ever offers you meth, just think of yourself with a busted ass All Seeing eye tattooed on your forehead and remember that Al Jourgensen is at least a rich/semi famous methhead..  you would likely be much worse.  Also you might end up on facebook ranting about fighting off raccoons.  Real talk.

Ministry – Relapse

I’m waiting for the end of days
I think I’m good but I just might stay
But I’m too wasted to care
And if I go well fair is fair

I’m headed for a relapse

I’m waiting for the apocalypse in 2012
But I’m so wasted
I’ll see you all in hell

I relapse you laugh
I feel it coming
A total collapse

Well surgeons cut to heel you
Axe murders cut to kill you
Well I’m filthy rich and I’m horny
But you just fucking bore me

I relapse you laugh
I feel it coming
A total collapse

I just bitch and moan about all my groans

I’m headed for a relapse

Well I love life to death
But I also love crystal meth
But those two don’t usually get along
And a lot of people think that’s wrong

I relapse you laugh
I feel it coming
A total collapse

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