S.T.A.M. GO! (Super Tromette Action Movie GO!)

Super Tromette Action Movie GO! is a movie from 2008 that you’ve never heard of. It takes those classic cinematic hallmarks like homeless luchadoras, lazy alcoholic cops, banging old dudes, child rape, and insulting ethnic stereotypes, throws them in a pile, lights the pile on fire, and molds the ashes into a movie. If this sounds remotely entertaining to you, then congratulations. You’re fucked up. That’s perfectly ok though, because let me tell you about a silly way to kill an hour and a half!

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Super Tromette Action Movie GO!, or STAMGO! for those in a hurry.

This is sort of a hard movie to talk about. On one hand, it’s pretty objectively terrible. The acting is pretty spotty… There are issues with the script… Some of the editing is pretty wonky… It’s easy to dismiss this as some friends fucking around with a video camera and calling it a movie, much like my appraisal of The Leaf Blower Massacre. On the other hand, what really sets this movie apart is the clear passion from those involved, and the intent of the movie. There is absolutely nothing lazy or cynical about this movie, and that is something very refreshing to see. I wouldn’t even call it a failure, as you can tell that the end product was more or less the vision of the filmmakers when they started out, warts and all.

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Words cannot express how hard Leaf Blower Massacre can go fuck itself.

I don’t want it to sound like I’m giving this “Gold Medal in the Special Olympics” type praise. I actually enjoyed watching this movie quite a bit. There are several gags that are legitimately clever, and as wacky as things get, they never stray too far into the random. The silly stuff that happens is generally in there to advance the plot, and doesn’t feel shoehorned, or thrown in to stretch it to feature length. Speaking of which, the fact that this movie actually IS feature length is admirable, as well. It’s 90+ minutes, but doesn’t really feel it. It would be easy to just say “Fuck it”, and make a short film. It’s nice to see people with a vision, and excecute it to the best of their abilities, and not half ass it.

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Our unusually named heroes.

The plot of the movie is pretty simple. Dyslexia (Merrie Swain), a lazy alcoholic cop, and Labia (Jen Tonon, who also wears the editor and writer hats here), a young woman fueled by vengance, team up to stop a group of children who call themselves The Naptime Ninjas, who have been ruining several local businesses. In these confrontations, they stumble on a group of pedophile flashers known as The Cock Shockers.  They are thrust into a conflict between the 2 groups, and along with Sanchez, their homeless luchadora sidekick, have to save the day.

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She also may or may not be Pancho Villa

Somewhere along the line, there is a catchy musical number about abusing young boys called “You Can Take the Boy Out of Tromaville, But You Can’t Take Me Out Of The Boy”. I know I probably lost some of you on that one, and believe me, I was looking for maybe a more delicate way to set it up. But this is so clearly over the top that it’s incredibly difficult to take any real offense to it.

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Unrelated to the song, but THIS guy was pretty damn funny.

I don’t want to spoil some of the better elements of this movie, as it’s one of those movies where the less you know about it the better. But be on the lookout for several notable cameos late in the movie, and Dyslexia’s interesting… accent, i guess?

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Spoiler alert. One of the cameos is fucking Lloyd Kaufman. AGAIN!!

Is this a movie everyone will enjoy? Well, no. That’s not meant as a slight since the objective of the filmmakers clearly wasn’t to reach a broad audience. In all honesty, I wouldn’t even call this a movie that most people would like. “some” might even be pushing it. However, as limited as its audience probably is, this movie really succeeds in being a fun watch for those with certain sensibilities. I know that this movie is a pretty deliberate homage to the works of Troma, but I’d actually say it falls more in line with the sensibilities of John Waters’ early films. It’s trashy, tasteless, sort of sloppy, and most importantly pretty constantly amusing. I would give it an enthusiastic recommendation to any fan of no budget trash cinema.

written by @johnnyzontal

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